The pandemic made me feel like I could explode. I was desperate to get out of the condo and reconnect with loved ones and friends, all before my patience ran out.

This extended isolation period revealed many things—how we value our time, the importance of health, and, most of all, our deep, innate need for connection.

Many of us didn’t just lose our everyday routines but the sudden and jarring disconnection from the people we care about. Whether it was colleagues at work, family, or friends, Zoom fatigue stopped us from filling this relational void with virtual calls and text messages.

The truth is, we’re wired for connection. It’s not just a preference; it’s a biological necessity.

Connection is a Biological Necessity

As neuroscientist Dr. Matthew Lieberman puts it, “Our need to connect is as fundamental as our need for food and water.”¹ Our social connections are vital to our mental and emotional well-being. Research shows that social pain, such as loneliness or being excluded, activates the same areas of the brain as physical pain.

No wonder we feel so profoundly impacted by isolation—it’s not just a feeling, it’s a neurological response.

The calls for isolation and physical separation took a heavy toll on us. Loneliness spiked, and so did feelings of anxiety and depression. What we longed for was simple yet profound: connection.

The Emotional Impact of Disconnection

Brené Brown, a leading researcher on vulnerability and human connection, perfectly captured this: “Connection is why we’re here; it is what gives purpose and meaning to our lives.”² 

Without connection, we feel adrift—unable to fully engage with the world or ourselves.

This isn’t just about personal relationships. It’s also about professional ones. Think about how different work felt during the pandemic. Even if Zoom and TEAM calls kept the work moving, many reported feeling disconnected from their colleagues and even their sense of purpose.

Johann Hari, in his book Lost Connections, argues that many of the issues people face, such as addiction or anxiety, are rooted in a loss of meaningful connection. He puts it simply: “The opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection.”³ It’s not enough to live on autopilot; we need genuine, authentic relationships to thrive.

So, how do we rebuild those authentic connections? How do we create ones that bring purpose and joy?

3 Steps to Empower Yourself to Build Meaningful Connections

1. Be Vulnerable and Authentic

Vulnerability is not a weakness—it’s the foundation of meaningful connection. When we open up and allow others to see the real us, they are more likely to respond in kind. Brené Brown’s research highlights that the courage to be vulnerable brings people closer together.

At home, this could mean having deeper conversations with family members about your day, your dreams, and your struggles. It might mean sharing personal stories during meetings or acknowledging challenges at work.

Actionable Tip: Take the first step by being the one to share. Lead with authenticity, whether during a family dinner or a team meeting. It’s contagious.

2. Practice Active Listening

Listening isn’t just about hearing the words someone says—it’s about truly understanding and engaging with their message. Active listening involves empathy and presence, making the other person feel valued and heard.

Being a great listener can set you apart and deepen your relationships in a world of short attention spans.

Actionable Tip: At home, ask open-ended questions and focus on the answer. When a colleague speaks at work, focus on them—no multitasking, just listening. Feel free to engage by asking clarifying questions, which demonstrates you care about what they’re saying.

3. Be Intentional About Connection

Stop allowing your relationships to slip. Meaningful connections don’t happen by accident. They require effort and intentionality. Whether setting up regular check-ins with friends or planning family time, making connections a priority will strengthen your relationships.

Actionable Tip: Designate a weekly “family night” with no distractions at home. At work, block time to check in with colleagues regularly. You don’t need an agenda steeped in workflow; just ask how they’re doing. Connecting doesn’t require any formality, just consistency.

Rebuilding and Strengthening Connections

Connection isn’t just something we desire; we need to feel whole. Extended isolation may have shaken our sense of connection, but it also taught us how important it is to nurture and sustain our relationships. Whether at home or at work, rebuilding meaningful connections will enrich not only our lives but also those around us.

Today, reach out to someone, even with a simple text or a call. It’s never too late to reconnect.

Copyright © 2024 by CJ Powers

1. Lieberman, Matthew. Social: Why Our Brains Are Wired to Connect. New York: Crown, 2013. ↩︎
2. Brown, B. (2010). The gifts of imperfection: Let go of who you think you’re supposed to be and embrace who you are. Hazelden Publishing. ↩︎
3. Hari, J. (2018). Lost connections: Uncovering the real causes of depression – and the unexpected solutions. Bloomsbury Publishing. ↩︎